What I know now
by DevotedtoScorbus
Summary: Albus and Struggle with the separation and reach a breaking point.


Life was a nightmare for Scorpius Malfoy and for the most part, he didn't even want to face the real world without Albus Potter. His heart was utterly torn in half. He didn't have the will to live but he did it with the hope he might reunite with Albus again. That's who kept him going.

Old memories of him and Albus replayed in his head constantly causing him to hallucinate his best friend to a point he thought it was real. Once reality set in, he became worse and worse. He knew deep down and on the surface he would never get over the trauma.

Whenever Scorpius saw Lily or James or even Delphi, the pain was more than he can bear. When time called for it, he went to professor McGonagall to question her about Albus. She heard a knock on the door, "You may enter," she gave permission. Scorpius walked through the door with a frown, "How is Albus? Please. I need to know. Does he ever mention me?" He pleaded to receive some good news.

She pointed to a chair, "Have a sit Scorpius and we can talk." He followed her command and sat down waiting for anything to happen. Professor McGonagall cleared her throat, "I could tell you what you want to hear or I can be honest with you. Either way, neither could be taken lightly," she explained. He didn't know how to respond or find some type of excuse to make the situation better.

Scorpius sighed deeply, "Losing Albus is the worst thing that happened to me. I rather hear what you have to say instead of a sugar coated lie. Please, don't try to spin this." She nodded, "fair enough. The truth is Albus is unhappy. Just the other day, he was writing these letters about you. I found a few of them in his room and it was the most heartbreaking thing. He is not the Albus I know and to make matters worse, you are no the Scorpius I know," she added bringing Scorpius into the equation. "You need to fight for him like you've never fought before. You two-you and Albus are meant to be," she stated the obvious to persuade the youngest Malfoy boy to do the right thing.

A lump formed in Scorpius's throat. He wanted to break down in front of her. Scorpius put on a brave face, "How do I find him? What about the map? You were given orders by his father to report to him whenever we are seen together." She shook her head, "This is not okay. It will never be okay. I condemn the decisions. You and Albus can't be separated. You just can't." She looked him dead serious in the eyes.

After the small meeting with professor McGonagall, Scorpius left mouthing, "Thank You," before exiting. He ran towards the flight of stairs to return to his dormitory noticing Albus in front of him a couple seconds later. He held his breath to not draw attention.

As the two stairs went separate ways, Albus and Scorpius turned to look at each other. One had a puffy red face from so much crying and the other went pale nearly passing out. Scorpius walked up a step followed by Albus. For a second, they tried to avoid eye contact.

If either thought the other boy wasn't looking, they tried to glance as quickly as possible which failed.

The only though running through Albus's head is Scorpius never forgiving him and how he should have chosen him over his father. He regretted the decision very much and wished he could rewind time and fix the biggest mistake of his life. By hurting Scorpius, Albus hurt himself in the process. He had a choice and chose wrong.

On the other hand, Scorpius craved to hug Albus even if it would be the last time. He wanted to feel his touch. He wanted to be close to him. He wanted to have him back for good. He wanted to jump over the staircase and be near him. He wanted the whole package, all of him. He didn't want to wake up one more day realizing Albus is distant from him.

All of a sudden, neither Albus nor Scorpius could breathe. They felt their lungs losing the ability to function right. Every part of them didn't feel real anymore.

From a society perspective, there are worse things in life one can deal with than losing a best friend. The same can't be said for Scorpius and Albus, definitely not by a long shot. Nothing compares to this.

Scorpius and Albus felt the weight on their shoulder's building heavier with each passing look as a constant reminder they lost touch with reality. Every emotion became stronger. Pressure built inside their head causing them to collapse to the ground on their knees.

Lily and James were concerned about the two of them. They happened to walk by and witness the scene taking place. "James, if something happens to Albus or Scorpius….."He placed a hand on his sister's shoulder, "Do you see what's happening? It's not just two friends missing each other and unable to cope. Our brother and Scorpius have deep feelings for each other. I've known for a while. I wasn't aware to which degree until now. Being apart is dangerous for both of them." Lily's jaw dropped. She had no idea, "You mean this whole time?" She looked at James. He nodded and replied, "It's always been like this Lily. They are head over heel for each other," he repeated with more emphasis. She smiled to herself, "We need a plan," she told him with a shaky tone.

The two Slytherin boys now lying on the stairs faced each other teary eyed and weak. There was no other world for them. They are each other's world.


End file.
